DREAMS Last night I kept dreaming random things about Mike, and how I've finally got attached, which is not good considering I've leaving in two months. Part of me wants to chase after him and the rest of me is scared still. Why couldn't this happen earlier? But at least it happened!
UNI CLASSWORK Not much today in comparison to Tuesday except for a meeting for IFM, which Mike seemingly "forgot" about. Which meant that Stephen dropped into the Bungies to get me, and of course we couldn't find Arthur because he's slow and doesn't think to text people with where he is when he's supposed to be somewhere else. I had to endure Stephen for an hour with us trying to keep conversation going because when we're alone and there's nothing to talk about, we struggle. And when Art showed up, it's like someone poked us and we came to life.
Meanwhile Elaine walked by twice to which I ignored her and she ignored me, so it kind of made me feel empowering to not care. Because really, I do care in a way, but when it comes down to it, all I care about is having one less friend. Not her per se.
The great thing about Stephen is though, that he does teach us what we didn't learn in class and I actually listen and ask questions since it's just the three of us. It makes studying much easier and better for me.
CULTURE I took a break for lunch and ran down there only to be greeted by massive amounts of muslims girls. It was awkward only because I'm rarely around them and yet here they are in massive amounts this semester. Although it's great because that means I'm finally in contact with that culture. At the dessert counter there was Megan who said, "I prepared this earlier just for you" because she makes me laugh. Not bad for someone who I thought was a bitch last semester. A cultural lesson I learned long ago (that it takes a while for Aussie women to warm up to American girls) is still true.
ADVICE Stephen is always full of it. About how I should stand up from the start to prevent people walking over me (and then when I do stand up for myself they think I'm suddenly a bitch). And how "You're only worth what you think you're worth." And how I can do anything I want. And how I need confidence to just go in there and do it (if you act like you belong, they will believe it). JOB He told me that, yes, we learn on the job. Uni does not prepare you except for a foundation and discipline. And that I'm detailed oriented, so I need details before I start something or else I worry.
Talking with people these days, especially to Stephen, makes me realize that life experiences and reading the news does help so much when it comes to conversations. I feel smarter and I can talk about so much more now.
YING & LITTLE PLEASURES Finally at lunch I ran into Ying, unfortunately, and we were both surprisingly nice. She asked if I'd get take-away and of course I said yes, knowing she wanted me to invite her to eat with me, but I refused. Naturally she went off on her own despite me making small talk and stalked like a little kid when I stayed to talk to Mike about class. We talked for twenty minutes until he really had to go back to work (group work, exams, studying, Arthur's weirdness), during which he went out of his way to give me his number again (even though it's only for his personal use to have me call about when Stephen's "teaching" us again). Despite that, it still made me feel good for him to treat me so nicely. I'm not being used, as we're already friends, so it's okay. And turning out of instinct to see Ying staring as she ate her soup before she left was just pure gold. She's so jealous that it's easy to piss her off. Before I left he joked some more with me and then I was off to eat.
UNI CLASSWORK Not much today in comparison to Tuesday except for a meeting for IFM, which Mike seemingly "forgot" about. Which meant that Stephen dropped into the Bungies to get me, and of course we couldn't find Arthur because he's slow and doesn't think to text people with where he is when he's supposed to be somewhere else. I had to endure Stephen for an hour with us trying to keep conversation going because when we're alone and there's nothing to talk about, we struggle. And when Art showed up, it's like someone poked us and we came to life.
Meanwhile Elaine walked by twice to which I ignored her and she ignored me, so it kind of made me feel empowering to not care. Because really, I do care in a way, but when it comes down to it, all I care about is having one less friend. Not her per se.
The great thing about Stephen is though, that he does teach us what we didn't learn in class and I actually listen and ask questions since it's just the three of us. It makes studying much easier and better for me.
CULTURE I took a break for lunch and ran down there only to be greeted by massive amounts of muslims girls. It was awkward only because I'm rarely around them and yet here they are in massive amounts this semester. Although it's great because that means I'm finally in contact with that culture. At the dessert counter there was Megan who said, "I prepared this earlier just for you" because she makes me laugh. Not bad for someone who I thought was a bitch last semester. A cultural lesson I learned long ago (that it takes a while for Aussie women to warm up to American girls) is still true.
ADVICE Stephen is always full of it. About how I should stand up from the start to prevent people walking over me (and then when I do stand up for myself they think I'm suddenly a bitch). And how "You're only worth what you think you're worth." And how I can do anything I want. And how I need confidence to just go in there and do it (if you act like you belong, they will believe it). JOB He told me that, yes, we learn on the job. Uni does not prepare you except for a foundation and discipline. And that I'm detailed oriented, so I need details before I start something or else I worry.
Talking with people these days, especially to Stephen, makes me realize that life experiences and reading the news does help so much when it comes to conversations. I feel smarter and I can talk about so much more now.
YING & LITTLE PLEASURES Finally at lunch I ran into Ying, unfortunately, and we were both surprisingly nice. She asked if I'd get take-away and of course I said yes, knowing she wanted me to invite her to eat with me, but I refused. Naturally she went off on her own despite me making small talk and stalked like a little kid when I stayed to talk to Mike about class. We talked for twenty minutes until he really had to go back to work (group work, exams, studying, Arthur's weirdness), during which he went out of his way to give me his number again (even though it's only for his personal use to have me call about when Stephen's "teaching" us again). Despite that, it still made me feel good for him to treat me so nicely. I'm not being used, as we're already friends, so it's okay. And turning out of instinct to see Ying staring as she ate her soup before she left was just pure gold. She's so jealous that it's easy to piss her off. Before I left he joked some more with me and then I was off to eat.
